0317

DISARM YOU WITH A SMILE!
leave you like they left me here to wither in denial
the bitterness of one who's left alone
ooooooooh the years burn

"It is rare indeed that people give. Most people guard and keep; they suppose that it is they themselves and what they identify with themselves that they are actually guarding and keeping, whereas what they are actually guarding and keeping is their system of reality and what they assume themselves to be. One can give nothing whatever without giving oneself- that is to say, risking oneself. If one cannot risk oneself, then one is simply incapable of giving. And, after all, one can give freedom only by setting someone free."

"Life is tragic simply because the earth turns and the sun inexorably rises and sets, and one day, for each of us, the sun will go down for the last, last time. Perhaps the whole root of our trouble, the human trouble, is what we will sacrifice all the beauty of our lives, will imprison ourselves in totems, taboos, crosses, blood sacrifices, steeples, mosques, races, armies, flags, nations, in order to deny the fact of death, which is the only fact we have. It seems to me that one ought to rejoice in the fact of death- ought to decide, indeed, to earn one's death by confronting with passion the conundrum of life."

"And the universe is simply a sounding drum; there is now way, no way whatever, so it seemed then and has sometimes seemed since, to get through a life, to love your wife and children, or your friends, or your mother and father, or to be loved. The universe, which is not merely the stars and the moon and the planets, flowers, grass and tress, but other people, has evolved no terms for your existence, has made no room for you, and if love will not swing wide the gates, no other power will or can. And if despairs-as who has not?-of human love, God’s love alone is left."

"Perhaps one cannot ask for more. People always seem to band together in accordance to a principle that has nothing to do with love, a principle that releases them from personal responsibility."

"The question of who I was
had at last become a personal question,
and the answer was to be found in me."



JUST READ THE BOOK ALREADY:
The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin

1. Painted on my second litho stone, mildly satisfied
2. Walked halfway home in the rain
3. Received my Horizon Perfekt in the mail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4. Realized that the rest of my crickets escaped
5. Said "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUck" for a while
6. Took an E.H.N (Extremely Hearty Nap)
7. Took 5-hour ENERGY about ten minutes ago
8. It's now 23:03:46. Crunch time.

Or is it?

I'm glad we're on the same page, even if it's a picture book.




So charming. I'm so charmed.

What a beautiful face
I have found in this place
That is circling all around the sun
What a beautiful dream
That could flash on the screen
In a blink of an eye and be gone from me
Soft and sweet
Let me hold it close and keep it here with me

And one day we will die
And our ashes will fly
From the aeroplane over the sea
But for now we are young
Let us lay in the sun
And count every beautiful thing we can see
Love to be
In the arms of all I'm keeping here with me

What a curious life
We have found here tonight
There is music that sounds from the street
There are lights in the clouds
Anna's ghost all around
Hear her voice as it's rolling and ringing through me
Soft and sweet
How the notes all bend and reach above the trees

Now, how I remember you
How I would push my fingers through your mouth
To make those muscles move
That made your voice so smooth and sweet
And now we keep where we don't know
All secrets sleep in winter clothes
With one you loved so long ago
Now he don't even know his name

What a beautiful face
I have found in this place
That is circling all around the sun
And when we meet on a cloud
I'll be laughing out loud
I'll be laughing with everyone I see
Can't believe
How strange it is to be anything at all

Hey from the San Francisco Bay
I've moved out, in and away

Consider again that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there – on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.

The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds.

Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the Universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.

The Earth is the only world known so far to harbor life. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit, yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment the Earth is where we make our stand.

It has been said that astronomy is a humbling and character-building experience. There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our tiny world. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly with one another, and to preserve and cherish the pale blue dot, the only home we've ever known.

I'm completely at a loss of words when it comes to feelings.
Overwhelmed is a nice description.
Grateful
Thankful
Wonderful
Beautiful
Blah blah blahful

I'm so happy and I have so much love for everybody and everything.
For the past weeks I've been trying to write about my blessings,
But after too many attempts
THERE
ARE
still
just
NO
WORDS.

What there is is just love
and some more love
and extra love
and all around love
and all together love
and all the love in me
and all the love ever
and one love.

1. For the longest time I've had worse-than-dial-up connection because I was downloading too much shit all the time, so Time Warner put a cap on my computer. Switched to AT&T, which now allows me to do some solid interneting (finally) and hopefully the same wouldn't happen again because I'm a pretty hardcore pirate.

2. I'm going through a serious Led Zeppelin phase.

3. Moving out and away in zactly three weeks, but have yet to find out who my suite-mate is and the number to my room.

4. Haven't done any kind of art probably since I dropped out of AVPA. Not good.

5. I <3 work.

6. I'm kind of a wreck, if you couldn't already tell.

I must study politics and war that my sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. My sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy, geography, natural history, naval architecture, navigation, commerce and agriculture in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry, music, architecture, statuary, tapestry, and porcelain.

I've made friends with too many people who are excessively into themselves.

Solution 1: Kidnapping, brainwashing
Solution 2: Voodoo or other sorts of black magic
Solution 3: Listen to John Lennon
Solution 4: Move to the Netherlands
Solution 5: Get a boyfriend then get pregnant
Solution 6: Alternate the days being on DMT and PCP
Solution 7: Make new ones
Solution 8: Stay loving






Just like little girls and boys
playing with their little toys
seems like all they really were doing
was waiting for you.

Do you think that when Christ is lying there and they’re nailing the nails in he’s saying, “Oh man, does that hurt!”? He’s probably looking at the guy who’s nailing him with

ABSOLUTE COMPASSION

HE DIGS WHY THE CAT’S DOING IT.
WHAT HE’S STUCK IN
HOW MUCH DUST COVERS HIS EYES
WHY HE’S GOT TO BE DOING IT

THAT’S THE WAY IT IS

HE SAID THE NIGHT BEFORE:
“WELL, TOMORROW IS THE BIG TRIP.
YEAH-RIGHT-THESE ARE THE NAILS
WOW! LOOK AT THAT!

AM I HE WHO IS BEING PAINED?
NO! THAT’S THE THING.
ONCE YOU KNOW THAT THEN:
PLEASURE & PAIN
LOSS & GAIN
FAME & SHAME
ARE ALL THE SAME

THEY’RE
ALL
JUST
HAPPENING.